Well hey. It's been almost a year. I can remember exactly when I stopped blogging. It was when Jady was in the hospital. I started typing up that story and just haven't been able to relive it, though this is technically my journal that y'all get to look at so as painful as that experience was I am going to finish writing it this week.
But that's not what I'm writing about today. I told someone the story of Jace and I a day or so ago and it has been festering with me, because I told it wrong. I might be a little obsessive compulsive, but our story is such a strength to me and a testimony of the presence of God in our lives that I just can't let it go until I do the story justice. It is broken down into events that seemed coincidental at the time, but are the reason we are together. This time I'll focus on the right details. This is the story I'll tell my kids:
Moving to Colorado
In the middle of my junior year in high school my parents informed me that we were moving to Colorado. I was so pissed! I had a very serious boyfriend, my friends, my beach. I hated the very thought of it. Soon after I broke up with that boyfriend. I lived down the street from my cousin, one of my best friends now. And I didn't know then that Jace lived an hour away from me.
Meeting at the right time in the right way
I had the chance to meet Jace sooner than I did. My cousin was going on a date with one of his friends and wanted me to double with them. Bradley (his friend) told me about two friends that he could bring for my date. I didn't choose Jace. And the date didn't work out. I know now that if I had met Jace then we may not be together now. Instead, I found him later on MySpace and we learned everything about each other before we met. We needed to because our first impressions were less than awesome. When I met him in person Jace had crazy curly hair down past his shoulders. He said he wasn't going to college, but was going to be a pro snowboarder. And that's all I would have seen if I didn't know how smart he was, how much he adored his family and how good his heart was. When Jace met me in person he saw a very young girl. He's only a year and a half older than me, but I'm small. And that's all he would have seen if he didn't know my maturity and how "quarky" I was (direct quote from him). So we kept dating in spite of what we looked like at first.
Pivotal Mistakes
I told too much of this part of the story before. When in truth, I have nothing to do with that girl now. The second I went through the temple that was all washed away and I came out a different person. But I had made some very big mistakes that I could not take back just before dating Jace. I hope my children do not have the same philosophy I did as a teenager: "Try it out first to see if it's bad." I could have gotten to a transitional stage in a much healthier way, but the mistakes that stacked on top of each other was the way I chose. And it made me look back and see a mess that I didn't want. Jace also had "skeleton's in the closet" and had felt a desire to change too. So when we met we were not where we wanted to be, but we were on our way. We never really said it out loud to each other, but just changed.
Ward Missionaries
Around the time we started dating, my bishop decided to try something new. He called my entire family to be ward missionaries. Usually this calling is given to an individual or a couple. One of the main responsibilities is to support what I guess I'll call the proselyting Missionaries (these are young men and women that chose to be sent to an area for two years and do nothing but share the gospel). We would often sit in on discussions with people investigating the church. One night Jace and I wanted to go out on a date, but my mom said we had a discussion to go to so the only way we could go out was if Jace came with us to the discussion first. Jace was not planning on going on a mission. (It is pretty custom in our church for all boys to go on a mission when they turn 19, now the age is 18). I was a little uncomfortable with this idea, but Jace agreed. During the discussion something miraculous happened. Jace began baring his testimony. He continued to carry the rest of the discussion. And suddenly both of us had something we wanted to share with these people thinking about getting baptized. In the car ride home, Jace said he may have a desire to go on a mission now.
A Mother's Intuition
Rewinding a little...On our third date, Jace and I stayed out till 2am. My parents were furious. My mother actually said I would "never see him again". I argued that she was 100% wrong about him. That he was the most respectful boyfriend I'd ever had. And he proved me right. He called me that night and asked to talk to my mom. Both of us were pretty surprised as my mom sat and listened to him tell her that he had made a mistake. She had put her precious daughter in his care and he did not take good care of her. He promised her it would never happen again. My mom was speechless and obviously impressed, so the grounding moved from forever to two weeks. In those two weeks he wrote me my first song (one of many). We reached our first monumental feeling: missing each other. When we were reunited, he went on that missionary discussion and soon after we had The Talk of All Talks. We were on the phone very late at night when he told me he loved me, and I told him I loved him back. My mom had her hand on my door knob, ready to tell me to get off the phone when she felt impressed to let it go and go to bed. I am so grateful she listened to that prompting. We talked about getting married. And then he said that couldn't happen until he went on a mission. He wanted to give me what his father gave his mom. I promised him I loved him no matter what. I would marry him if he stayed or went. His mom thanks me for that comment now, because she knew of her son's need to have choices which was exactly what I was giving him. Both of our mothers had been praying a great deal for us. Today, our moms are best friends.
Standing on Our Own Two Feet
While prepping for his mission, Jace and I were such a power house. I had strong convictions in my religion again. We read scriptures together, went to church together, and whenever we felt our pure relationship slip we would drop to our knees and pray to be better. I was immovable. And then he went on his mission. Both of us had not known just how much leaning we were doing on each other. I fell fast and hard. I got a job at Zumiez as an assistant manager because it was Jace's favorite store. I had no direction, but his. And then I tried to pick myself up on my own and fell again, and again and again. I put Jace through hell with my letters. Months before his arrival I finally figured it out. I continued to try to find my testimony in someone else. I needed to mend one very important relationship before Jace came home: the relationship I had with my Savior, Jesus Christ. So I learned of him. I read my scriptures often. The only thing I would allow myself to listen to in the car were gospel talks and gospel music. I sucked out all the poison I could find. The last month I spent in Europe with my best friend. Thank heavens for Haley Edmunds who was my constant companion for that last little stretch. She helped me keep the spirit close by.
And then he was home. He wasn't set apart immediately which meant as a missionary he couldn't even hug me. So he gave me a thimble (if you've ever seen "Hook" that means a kiss). A month later he took me back to his mission and I met the people he had touched. And they knew allllll about me. Under a gazebo overlooking the lake in Wisconsin (his mission) he played his guitar and sang all the songs he wrote me. I just watched him and cried because I knew we had made it, finally! It started to rain so he put an ear bud in my ear and we danced in the rain to music from his ipod (the modern day way of dancing in the rain). And then he asked if he could have me forever.
And that's our story. 5 years later and I still get butterflies when he comes home from work. I still love that shaggy snowboarder I met 8 years ago.
